Learning From Suffering

A year ago today, I was supposed to be having a baby. Yes, it was my due date. I was working full-time at night as a new nurse in the ER, while 9 months pregnant. If that doesn’t sound scary and awful then I don’t know what does. Although it was an extremely hard part of my life, it made me completely rely on God. There were nights where I had no idea if I would make it. Whether from exhaustion, going into labor, or getting fired on the spot from making a medical error. Either of those options could have been plausible. I would often cry before I had to go to work and sometimes when I got home as well, depending on what I had seen that night.
While being in the ER there were two things that became very clear to me. I can’t do anything without God, and suffering is a very real concept.

1. I can’t do anything without God.

There were nights when I was overloaded with patients. One night in particular I had way too many patients to handle as a 9 month pregnant nurse. I was assigned a lady having a miscarriage, an elderly lady from a nursing home whose temperature was 93 degrees Fahrenheit, a lady who was having consecutive seizures in a row, and an elderly lady who was coding on the table all at the same time. At that moment I wanted to either run the other direction or magically make a clone of myself. Obviously none of those are options, so I quietly prayed that I would be able to get through the night. In these crazy times I would often pray two verses over and over again.
I can do all things through him who strengthens me.
Philippians 4:13
For nothing will be impossible with God. 
Luke 1:37
Both of these verses were so easy to memorize and brought me through some of the toughest challenges I faced. In that particular night, God rescued me and showed me exactly where to be at the right time. At the end of that shift I was still overwhelmed and tired, but I actually made it through the night once again!

2. Suffering is a very real concept.

Within the time span of a year in the ER, I had experienced suffering myself, and seen so much of it from others. The pain that people go through, and the loss is incredible. I remember asking people what their pain level was from a 0-10. They would nonchalantly state, “It’s about a 10 I think.” I would be cringing, because my pain level with a contraction was at least a "7" at that exact moment.  Throughout that season of life, pain and suffering were very tangible, and I started to grasp a tiny bit of what Christ felt on the cross. I realized the more and more I felt suffering, the more I would understand what Jesus went through for me. It was definitely one of the hardest things I’ve gone through but also the most eye opening.
Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you.
1 Peter 4:12
 We need to comprehend that suffering is not bad, and it teaches us way more than comfortability could. We can’t run away from challenges forever.
Being a year removed from this particular challenge has shown me that Christ uses all circumstances in our life for good, and I know that God will come through in your seemingly impossible situation as well!